Monday, February 16, 2009

Waiting for Nelson-sensei...Part 10

Dear Willie Nelson-sensei,

Greetings from beautiful* Willis, Katuah, where the Bear Magic Hockey Team Bank is busily preparing for the work opportunities you will be bringing to our region tomorrow.

Tomorrow at this time, our bank will begin cooking a breakfast which is designed to meet your personal nutritional and artistic needs by surrounding you with well-fed, un-grumpy team members who are skilled in the art of Legend Care.

A recent call to the Local 55 turned up some interesting info: Our breakfast should include at least 8 stagehand meals if we are to comply with the stringent food security regulations set forth by the Snaque Shaque, which governs our budget.

Legend Willie, if you are SURE that this will be enough stagehand breakfasts to enable you to deal with the crowds that will undoubtedly be facing this 2-17, please begin your day tomorrow with confidence. The IATSE 55 is a professional and highly skilled team of workers who take your musical career very seriously. If the breakfasts wind up being shared by additional workers who need to be hired on an emergency basis to accommodate the throngs tomorrow, I am sure that nobody will pass out, since a third party Snaque provider will be on hand to prevent this from happening.

You will be entering this realm with so many accumulated Bear Magic Real Estate Credits, though, that it seems to me to make sense to get re-acquainted with IATSE headmen in this region and others to see if more Breakfast Credits might possibly be issued tomorrow from your personal stash.

In any case, please enjoy your journey through Katuah, and please do not hesitate to contact me for any reason whatsoever. It is my wish that your newly issued Bear Magic Hockey Team bank card will function flawlessly tomorrow, and every day, regardless of the cultural weather.

Thanks very much for your investments in this region, and thank you for choosing the Bear Magic Hockey Team Bank.

Sincerely,

Suzy Nees
Bank President

P.S. If you should find our banking center up in flames tomorrow please do not be alarmed. This is a normal event within the Burning Dollar music & arts festival. Special precautions are taken to ensure that no critters or people are harmed in any way by this activity.

Your snaques & such WILL be toast if such events do unfold tomorrow, though, so I would encourage you to call well in advance if you wish to inquire about the cost of contingency breakfasts in this region. I recommend Gillie's in Blacksburg, or Dino's in Willis, for this purpose.

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* The Bear Magic Hockey Team Bank does not advocate offering access to U.S. currency to persons based on the fact that they live in a beautiful region, since all this really seems to do is enrage Pele-sama and encourage lending institutions toward co-dependence on regional tax harvesting mechanisms.